This Was It
by absolute nonsense
Summary: Chad Dylan Cooper wasn't afraid of anything, but he was terrified of two things.


**AN:** Hi there… it's been a _very_ long time since I've written something for FF. I use to write a while ago, but lost interest. Lately, I've got many _inspirations_ to write and I had all these ideas floating around in my head. So, instead of forgetting them all, I decided to write them down. I don't think I'll be continuing to write though, this is simply something was in my mind and had to get out. Maybe once in awhile I will, so look at for me! Compared to my previous work, SWAC is kind of to write for, LOL. Please note that I have _grown as a writer_. My old work sucks terribly. I'm ashamed of it, I'm going to have to admit :) but, don't judge me from my old stuff and focus on the new. K, enough of this stupid long author's note. _Thanking you_ in advance for reading my one-shot, please remember to review at the end. Kthanks :D

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing.

**Note:** Oh, please note that the style I've written my shot in (the creativeness of the italics, bolds, underline, spacing, etc. that was all inspiration from a story **SilverAurora** wrote. So, credit goes to her.

* * *

You know those secrets where they're so deep and dark, that no one knows about them. Not even your best friend. You hardly even know about them yourself. Well, those secrets are the ones that you don't say out loud. These the ones that are more then secrets.

They are **f e a r s**.

Chad Dylan Cooper wasn't afraid of anything. But he was _terrified_ of two things.

Rejection and commitment.

Although he'd never admit it, Chad has two deep dark secrets and that's what they are.

Believe it or not, Chad's longest relationship was **a month and three days**. Rejected? **never**. CDC doesn't get rejected. He rejects. Poor girls. Many of them begged and pleaded for Chad, but a simply world can cause utter _pain_. Can make your whole world go down.

'**NO**'.

This was a word Chad said quite often. But, not once had it been said to him.

Sure, Mackenzie had been rejected before. But Chad had to keep on reminding himself that Mackenzie Falls was **n o t h i n g** like the reality. The fear of rejection taunted him.

This brings us back to the fact that Chad's longest relationship was a month and three days. Why you ask? Because Chad Dylan Cooper _did not commit_. It's simply for publicity_. Nothing more, nothing less_. He never thought nor indented to be committed to someone. **It was pointless, stupid, a waste of time**.

Chad had been acting since he was seven years old. When you're younger than that, you still believed that girls had couties. So, he never once thought of being in a long term relationship with anyone... _except for her_.

Rejection **plus** commitment **equals** her.

He was also afraid of her. For the first time in his life, he was _scared_.

Yes, he did think about her.

Yes, he did like her.

Yes, he wanted her.

YES.

She was different. Nothing like any other girls he had met before. Coming from a small town was no excuse. There was something about her that made her differ from the rest. He just couldn't figure it out.

He wanted her, so badly.

Whenever he thought of her, the fear of rejection and commitment somehow found its way into his mind.

You know that feeling when your best friend **stabs you right in the back**? That feeling where you love of your life had ripped _your heart out from your chest_ and ran over it with a truck? Yeah, that feeling. That's how Chad assumed he'd feel if she would have said **'no'.**

She constantly says, over and over again, she _h a t e s _him. She loathes him, despises him. Every possible hatred word you could think of is probably how **she** felt about **him**. Then again, doesn't he feel the same way about her? **Wrong**.

It was all just an act, a game. But was she playing it too? Is it all a lie?

What if he had asked her out? What if she said no. **REJECTION.**

But, what if she didn't? What if she says yes? Was he ready to commit to a relationship? _To care for someone else besides himself_. **COMMITMENT**.

Odds are she's not going to say yes. Chances are they could never be a 'real couple'. Risks are they're relationship would _change_ everything.

He rubbed his hands over his faces and got up from his conch.

Screw the odds, screw the chances, screw the risks, and screw the 'what ifs'.

So, what if she says no. so, what if he's afraid. **He is Chad Dylan Cooper**.

Chad found himself leaving his dressing room. He was nearly flying across the lot as he ran to stage 3.

This was it.

He made his way down the corridor and without a single knock; he turned the knob and walked right into her dressing room, scaring a pretty blonde looking at her self in the mirror.

"Chad? What the hell are you dong here coming in like that?"

"Where's _Sonny_?"

"In the prop room... why?"

Without a single word, Chad turned on his heel and left. Making his way downstairs. Turning the corner, he immediately spotted the lonely brunette lying on the conch, watching TV. He took a deep breath.

She heard him walk in and notice a completely strange emotion on his face. She didn't recognize the expression. It wasn't something he wore before.

"Chad, what are you doing here?" she grew worried, "is everything alright?"

**This was it.**

They were only a foot apart. Chad let out the breath he had been holding.

_This was it_.

The only way to get rid of your fear is to face it.

This was it.

* * *

**Open ending! Pretty sure all of you can figure out what can/would have happened at the end ;)**

**Thanks for reading! PLEASE review, it'll make the world such a better place :)**

**ox**


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